when my mom is home, there is always coffee brewing. she like me and my sister jane, brother and dad, have serious problems with coffee.

a year ago, in another one of her health attempts, my mom went through a phase where she didn’t intake caffeine. it made my life difficult, mainly because i didn’t know how to work a coffee maker.

me, who loves coffee, espresso, and everything in between, was twenty-one and unable to use a coffee machine. by looking into this situation a little deeper, i think you would find that most people are like this, if you have no reason to learn something, you just don’t learn it. my mom made coffee for me, why would i need to make it?

 i don’t know why i would.

well, i learned how, during that troubling time, and in fact, i’m really good at it. i make great coffee. obviously. i mean, it’s not a talent.

(i am currently enjoying home brewed, french roast, starbucks coffee, and listening to the orginal motion picture soundtrack, based on the orignal broadway musical soundtrack, RENT, based on the hiv. it’s so exciting. measure your life in love.)

i hate my mom’s health freak weirdness. i never am able to find food in the house, because you have to make everything from scratch. no easy mac, no diet coke, no fuckin’ white bread and skippy. my life is pain. i ate a roast beef sandwich on wheat with grey poupon an hour ago. i always forget how much dijon honey mustard sucks. it burns my nose. i always throw away half the sandwich, because i can’t take it anymore. i don’t know why i keep forgetting how much i hate it.

my brain fails me in this area.

my mom has never allowed junk food in the house. she actually blends black beans with our brownie mix, because it makes them more filling. sadly, my mom is right, and they still taste good. i’m really surprised that my family is not like really perfectly thin. furreal.

my sister jane wants to be a beautician. she could do that. she’s going to cut and color my hair today, she’s been cutting my hair since she was thirteen. jane could do well in most endeavors. she’s an uncommonly gifted individual.

do you think genius is inherited? both my parents are geniuses. it’s a weird thing, i mean what measures genius? my brother might fail an iq test, but who’s to say that he is not a musical genius? he is incredible and well above the rest. my sister, clara, is going to med school in another year. ever since she was little, biology and chemistry have come so easy for her. both clara and adam were also insanely talented at sports. my brother opted out of college football, when he realized that music to him, was more important. clara stopped running cross country, and took her bi-lingual self to germany for a year- and now they are on to something else.

i have two russian sisters. one of them is bi-lingual, and supermodel looking, and is the 400m 800m queen for track and field. and she’s adopted. my parents are so genius, they even know how to buy them.

the best thing about olivia is that i showed her the last paragraph i just wrote, and she burst out laughing. sense of humor can be the same in any launguage. 

i love talking about my family. we are all psychotic, crazy, bi-polar, ocd, adhd, undetermined lazy-asses. but, we are all so freaking cool, funny and beautiful, it’s fun to talk about.

my mom and dad are probably the most fucked up of us all. but they are also the most intelligent, gifted individuals i have ever met. they have everything they’re kids have and then some. i think thats why the one unforgiveable sin in our household is premarital sex. they don’t want us all ruining our lives by getting pregnant and the feeling obligated t0 marrying the wrong person. why would they want us to squander our brains the way they did?

me and jane blast Dido and Jewel, and dance around our rooms. only crazies dance to easy listening music.