how to be a total creeper.

spend long hours thinking about someone. make sure this person has no idea you exist.
or better yet, have this person hate you. then call him every second til he’s real pissed.

pretend you don’t care he hates you.
pretend you don’t know he wants you dead.
pretend you don’t understand that its over.
pretend to shoot holes into a picture of his head.

then get your ass up and drive past his house. repeat. take pictures of his work and his car,
pulling out of restaurants and the gym, then kiss his paper face and wish on stars.
dream big little one, just don’t get lost. hold your head up, don’t tear at the seams.
find your self alone but don’t let the mirror see your pain. then smoke a cigarette, get the vacuum out and clean.

you’ve got things to do, walk your dog. now pretend your talking to him.
like he came to find you and loves you now. then burn his name into your ankle skin.
watch a movie, eat to get real fat.
hold a pillow in your lap.
drink a forty all by yourself.
tell them all your fine, you don’t need help.

now pray to jesus even though you know he’s not there.
tell him your sins and how you loved.
how you loved
loved…
loved.
try again.
chase him down
down.
down.

don’t give up.
don’t ever give up.

how to be a total creeper.
by someone who knows.